Take Off the Armor!
What is the armor we have on?
It is all the behaviors and patterns that we engage in in order to “protect” ourselves from negative feelings.
We want to avoid anything that makes us feel uncomfortable, vulnerable and guilty. So, we put on armor that prevents us from touching anything that might activate those feelings.
We walk around this world avoiding anything that could cause us to feel those feelings and after a while, it becomes our purpose to avoid situations, people and experiences that might require us to be vulnerable.
We think that by avoiding our feelings and avoiding them to be felt, will somehow make them all disappear. But in actuality, we are just locking them away inside of ourselves. They’re not gone, they are still there. And you now have to carry the load of them with you, spend time and energy trying to hide them, and wonder why you don’t have the capacity to feel real joy and peace.
We’re actually allowing these negative feelings to control our lives. The present can never feel fresh, new and exciting because when we experience the present, we are carrying in the old energy as well.
It is okay. You are totally normal for doing this! Of course, you want to protect yourself from feeling crappy. But guess what you have to do to feel better? You have to feel your feelings. Even the crappy ones. Not to punish yourself or because you deserve to feel bad. But because if you keep avoiding the anger and the sadness that is inside, you will always have to run from situations that cause you anger and sadness. And whatever you’re running away from, will always have control over you.
And this is why you feel like a victim. Like the world is out to get YOU.
It’s not. That is your perception and perception feels like reality so you might be thinking, actually this chick has no idea what my life is like. Maybe. Maybe you are so unique, that your life is meant to not be easy.
But, I invite you to try something new:
Release yourself from old emotional wounds and feelings.
If you encounter a situation that immediately takes you back into a feeling of deep shame about yourself, do not run away from the feeling. Go somewhere like your bedroom or bathroom (I like the shower) and feel it. Where does the feeling live in your body? Does it feel like a heavy block on your chest and throat? Or like a pain in your stomach? Wherever it is, focus your attention on it and BREATHE. Maybe tears will come up and sounds. Let them. Do not let your mind come up with thoughts or pictures. No. Keep your attention AWAY from the mind and instead focus on where the feeling lives and breathe. Keep going until you feel better. Even if it is just 20% better, that is still better than avoiding the shame all together.
I promise you that this release is doing something HUGE. It is moving away those past wounds to make way for so much more in your life. More fun, more joy, more growth.
And if you ever need a friend to hold your hand in the process of this, I am here. To hop on a Zoom call (don't worry, no video) to hold the space for you to feel, to breathe and to FINALLY let go so you can take your armor off and feel free.
